I DID NOT MEAN IT TO BE THAT WAY!!!!!
-sobz-
ARRGH...
I slipped. I slipped.. OKAY!!!!
I'm human... CANT I BE DEPRESSED and THUS SLIP?
I WASNT EVEN HALF-THINKING WAD I WAS SAYING AT THAT TIME!!!!!!!!!
I never meant it to hurt anyone
I never meant it to hurt ME...
I just said that I wont be able to do better then her...
WRONG MEH!!
I WONT BE ABLE TO DO BETTER THEN HER.
I WONT BE ABLE TO DO BETTER THEN HIM.
I WONT BE ABLE TO DO BETTER THEN ANYBODY!!!!!
sobz...
i wont.
I'm losing my sanity... its hanging on a thread......
I'M SORRY!!! I'M SORRRY!!!!!
arrrrrgh..
sobz..
it wasnt meant to be this way... it wasnt....
ITS MY FAULT...
I'M INSENSITIVE
I'M UNCARING
I'M STUPID
I'M UNKIND
I'M IDIOTIC
I'M MORONIC
I'M DENSE
I'M RETARDED
I'M SLOW
I'M MENTALLY DECAPITATED
fine.
i lose.
again.
Thursday, February 03, 2005
ooh..133........
|
Your EQ is |
|
50 or less: Thanks for answering honestly. Now get yourself a shrink, quick! 51-70: When it comes to understanding human emotions, you'd have better luck understanding Chinese. 71-90: You've got more emotional intelligence than the average frat boy. Barely. 91-110: You're average. It's easy to predict how you'll react to things. But anyone could have guessed that. 111-130: You usually have it going on emotionally, but roadblocks tend to land you on your butt. 131-150: You are remarkable when it comes to relating with others. Only the biggest losers get under your skin. 150+: Two possibilities - you've either out "Dr. Phil-ed" Dr. Phil... or you're a dirty liar. |
Wednesday, February 02, 2005
USA's Top Cutest Musicians for 2004!
HeYaZ PeEpz... These are USA's selection for the most 1) Cutest 2) Handsome 3) Beautiful guys for the year 2004. Kinda like 30+ days late already.. these entry....
Orlando Bloom (saraaah oh sarah!! he's here!)
Usher
Josh Groban (ooh.. Pengiee will love this...)
Nelly
Jerry Yan
Enrique Iglesias
Nelly
Craig Davids
Bon Jovi
Aaron Carter
Okayz... thats all for those that I know.. there are a few that I do not know.. so I'm not going to publish it and clog up my blog.... =)
seeya again peepz...
Letting myself down... over and over again....
I cried...
I'm immune... I told myself... over and over again... I will not let it get me again....
I will not...
But I couldnt stop the tears...
I tried so hard... I wrote scripts.. I re-wrote scripts..
I rewrote the entire timeline 4 times.. Each taking me at least an hour...
I thought nothing could go wrong... but I was so wrong...
The timing rushed upon me... His countdown hit me so strongly... each number... 5,4,3,2,1 caused me heart to beat faster...
I thought I was going to have a stroke when everything was not going according to as plan...
I was panicking... Cold sweat was already running down my forehead.. this could not be happening... no... not now...
I didnt use a single term... i jus blabbered and wished that I would die on the spot...
if that wasnt bad enough..
After the ICA, the results for the previous test came...
I looked as people maked their results after results happily... I stared at the sheet of paper... I just could not believe it.... I got 71... I tried to imagine that I did not get that result... when I saw my name, I tried even harder to contain my tears...
Almost the entire class got higher then me...
Walking down to the gym... I couldnt contain my tears anymore... I tried so hard... and I fail myself again?.... why!!!??
I'm finished...
I wasnt sobbing, but I still could not contain the tears... when I saw Sonia, I tried to pretend nothing had happened... but deep down inside... I was still feeling the pain...
hold me...
I tried so hard to tell myself that I've done my best...
But everytime I see myself...
I feel so alone somehow...
Somehow, I've let myself down... again... and again....
hold me...
I tried my best to tell myself I did my hardest...
But everytime I see myself...
I see a reflection of a useless person...
Somehow, I've got to keep going on... and on...
Crying wont solve any problem....
But when you're cornered, with no path to turn to... do you have much options?...
Failure will not conquer me...
First... I have to conquer myself....
I.. die again....... I wont be broken again.... I've got to breathe... I cant keep going under....
I wont keep going under....
I will achieve my goal. even if I have to go insane.
I will achieve my goal. even if I have to work day and night
I will achieve my goal. even if I have to foresake my little bit of entertainment
Nothing will get in my way
Nothing.
DVPA: 71
WP: 76
FUNE: 77
IDEA: 80
GEMS: 82
NW: (so far.. only low Bs and Cs)
IPRA: (no comments. i dont even wish to know)
B.B.B.A.A
Bs for all the important modules and As for the useless ones...
Haiz...
I hate myself... I hate my life...
Totally.
Today's Interesting Fact: Hydroxydesoxycorticosterone and hydroxydeoxycorticosterones are the largest anagrams.
I'm immune... I told myself... over and over again... I will not let it get me again....
I will not...
But I couldnt stop the tears...
I tried so hard... I wrote scripts.. I re-wrote scripts..
I rewrote the entire timeline 4 times.. Each taking me at least an hour...
I thought nothing could go wrong... but I was so wrong...
The timing rushed upon me... His countdown hit me so strongly... each number... 5,4,3,2,1 caused me heart to beat faster...
I thought I was going to have a stroke when everything was not going according to as plan...
I was panicking... Cold sweat was already running down my forehead.. this could not be happening... no... not now...
I didnt use a single term... i jus blabbered and wished that I would die on the spot...
if that wasnt bad enough..
After the ICA, the results for the previous test came...
I looked as people maked their results after results happily... I stared at the sheet of paper... I just could not believe it.... I got 71... I tried to imagine that I did not get that result... when I saw my name, I tried even harder to contain my tears...
Almost the entire class got higher then me...
Walking down to the gym... I couldnt contain my tears anymore... I tried so hard... and I fail myself again?.... why!!!??
I'm finished...
I wasnt sobbing, but I still could not contain the tears... when I saw Sonia, I tried to pretend nothing had happened... but deep down inside... I was still feeling the pain...
hold me...
I tried so hard to tell myself that I've done my best...
But everytime I see myself...
I feel so alone somehow...
Somehow, I've let myself down... again... and again....
hold me...
I tried my best to tell myself I did my hardest...
But everytime I see myself...
I see a reflection of a useless person...
Somehow, I've got to keep going on... and on...
Crying wont solve any problem....
But when you're cornered, with no path to turn to... do you have much options?...
Failure will not conquer me...
First... I have to conquer myself....
I.. die again....... I wont be broken again.... I've got to breathe... I cant keep going under....
I wont keep going under....
I will achieve my goal. even if I have to go insane.
I will achieve my goal. even if I have to work day and night
I will achieve my goal. even if I have to foresake my little bit of entertainment
Nothing will get in my way
Nothing.
DVPA: 71
WP: 76
FUNE: 77
IDEA: 80
GEMS: 82
NW: (so far.. only low Bs and Cs)
IPRA: (no comments. i dont even wish to know)
B.B.B.A.A
Bs for all the important modules and As for the useless ones...
Haiz...
I hate myself... I hate my life...
Totally.
Today's Interesting Fact: Hydroxydesoxycorticosterone and hydroxydeoxycorticosterones are the largest anagrams.
I couldn lift my head to see you...
I failed myself... how much more would I fail you...
Dont get me wrong...
I still love you all the same...
I'm so scared that one day I'll fail you even...
I fail so much in everything I do....
-Kyo-
Tuesday, February 01, 2005
=STreSS=
s-t-r-e-s-s...
stress...
Spent the whole of the past few days studying and thinking up of ideas for IDEAS and DVPA.... CAN DIE AH!!
DVPA: I spent approximately 10hrs working on the various production timelines and questions
IDEAS: 5 hours of fruitless thinking...
I think Timo and me are getting along better... I'm starting to get immuned to his suan-ing (oh yeah.. suan is spelt as suan... thanks to May =D)... and he, is getting used to my... errr... i dunno... pessimism? haha....
IDEAS was totally crap... We crapped here and crapped there but I think we did pretty ok.. just that "scary ger" and Titus from the other class was like having guns of questions, fully loaded... I was pretty pissed... but I'm pretty ok now...
Oh yah!! in the midst of the IDEASproject, Timo, Sarah and Sonia came up with this mistake-cum-fantastic artwork... haha.. if ya didnt know, the Question and Answer slide is entirely designed by them.. because of a mistake.. lolz... Its really very nice lor...
Today is the 1st of Febuary! That means... 14 more days to go!! haha...
hmm... still thinking of wad can make her happy on that day...
My DVPA directions are SO difficult... I dont even know if I can do it... There are a whole big strings of commands to be given in 5 seconds....
I'm sooo screwwwed... wish me luck blogfanz... If do this well.. maybe... MAYBE.. I can direct a show like "Homerun!" or maybe "THe EyE" ooh... sonia will love this... (*throws another black rubbery string at her)
I'm in a sooo happy mood... nothing can get me down... hahaz....
I'm going to return back to my usual self... but this time, I'll bring with me a lesson.. That the main objective in life is to do your best and leave your mark on people's hearts... and if you can do both, you're more then sucessful in life...
Alex [EneUT] works in a PR firm! woohoo.. i think quite high position there too... maybe if I do well enough, I can go there to work during my ITP!... lolz.. I'm sure he will treat me very good de.. hahazzz..
I need to work out quick! I wanna get a killer body! lolz... no joke...
if i'm to impress her anytime soon i guess...
Recently have been working out at the gym... my muscles havent been working for awhile though, and I got kinda muscle ache after 2 hours or so training...
hahaz.... =P
My bro has been watching a couple of army shows... bleahz... I'm inspired! The mindset where comrade first, self last is so touching.. where a friend will die for another friend.. where a commander will rather commit suicide slow and painfully then tell where his subordinates are...
For the country, for the people, for my family...
We are the ones who keep the place you call home safe...
=D haha... I'm wierd.. I cant wait to go to the army.. most guys tell me I'm nuts...
But I think its cool!
hmm.. ahh.. I cant write anymore....
Next time blogfanz!
Today's Interesting Fact:
According to the United States Department of Agriculture, the best time to spray household insects is 4:00 p.m. Insects are most vulnerable at this time.
stress...
Spent the whole of the past few days studying and thinking up of ideas for IDEAS and DVPA.... CAN DIE AH!!
DVPA: I spent approximately 10hrs working on the various production timelines and questions
IDEAS: 5 hours of fruitless thinking...
I think Timo and me are getting along better... I'm starting to get immuned to his suan-ing (oh yeah.. suan is spelt as suan... thanks to May =D)... and he, is getting used to my... errr... i dunno... pessimism? haha....
IDEAS was totally crap... We crapped here and crapped there but I think we did pretty ok.. just that "scary ger" and Titus from the other class was like having guns of questions, fully loaded... I was pretty pissed... but I'm pretty ok now...
Oh yah!! in the midst of the IDEASproject, Timo, Sarah and Sonia came up with this mistake-cum-fantastic artwork... haha.. if ya didnt know, the Question and Answer slide is entirely designed by them.. because of a mistake.. lolz... Its really very nice lor...
Today is the 1st of Febuary! That means... 14 more days to go!! haha...
hmm... still thinking of wad can make her happy on that day...
My DVPA directions are SO difficult... I dont even know if I can do it... There are a whole big strings of commands to be given in 5 seconds....
I'm sooo screwwwed... wish me luck blogfanz... If do this well.. maybe... MAYBE.. I can direct a show like "Homerun!" or maybe "THe EyE" ooh... sonia will love this... (*throws another black rubbery string at her)
I'm in a sooo happy mood... nothing can get me down... hahaz....
I'm going to return back to my usual self... but this time, I'll bring with me a lesson.. That the main objective in life is to do your best and leave your mark on people's hearts... and if you can do both, you're more then sucessful in life...
Alex [EneUT] works in a PR firm! woohoo.. i think quite high position there too... maybe if I do well enough, I can go there to work during my ITP!... lolz.. I'm sure he will treat me very good de.. hahazzz..
I need to work out quick! I wanna get a killer body! lolz... no joke...
if i'm to impress her anytime soon i guess...
Recently have been working out at the gym... my muscles havent been working for awhile though, and I got kinda muscle ache after 2 hours or so training...
hahaz.... =P
My bro has been watching a couple of army shows... bleahz... I'm inspired! The mindset where comrade first, self last is so touching.. where a friend will die for another friend.. where a commander will rather commit suicide slow and painfully then tell where his subordinates are...
For the country, for the people, for my family...
We are the ones who keep the place you call home safe...
=D haha... I'm wierd.. I cant wait to go to the army.. most guys tell me I'm nuts...
But I think its cool!
hmm.. ahh.. I cant write anymore....
Next time blogfanz!
Today's Interesting Fact:
According to the United States Department of Agriculture, the best time to spray household insects is 4:00 p.m. Insects are most vulnerable at this time.
To see ya smile...
I'll walk for miles...
I wish I could hug you tight...
I wish that I could be right here by your side...
Starlight, star bright...
First star I see tonight...
I wish so hard.. I wish tonight...
I wish she'll be nice n alright...
Love ya.. Alwayz will..
-Kyo-
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